 (Nick Galifianakis for The Post) | Adapted from an online discussion. Dear Carolyn: My spouse's parents essentially disowned our entire family after we supported our transgender child. They are extremely devoted Catholics, and my father-in-law was very clear in his apoplectic emails that we were making the wrong decision for our child. My mother-in-law went along with it because that is "what wives do." Five years later, our trans child is a thriving ninth-grader, and our two younger children, 9 and 11, barely remember their grandparents. My parents have been 100 percent supportive since Day 1, fortunately. Recently, we heard through extended family that my mother-in-law has been having some minor health problems and my father-in-law reached out to my spouse, "Dan," with some initial feelers for reconciliation. Dan is cautious but misses his family. His brother has multiple health issues and told Dan that he couldn't go against my father-in-law's wishes because brother relies on their help. I am much more cynical; I think my father-in-law is worried about who will take care of them. Dan and I are financially secure in a way his brother is not. Also, I am unwilling to expose my kids to my father-in-law's toxic views and am still very hurt by some things he said while we were still in contact: for example, that we were committing child abuse. I am wondering how to navigate this. Dan is willing to continue to avoid contact if I am adamant, but I know he wishes things were different with his parents. Any advice would be welcome. — Wondering | 
